I recently had this exchange with a friend of mine experiencing some extreme financial distress. He's had the weight of this financial challenge hanging over his head for I don't know how damn long.
My statement:
...If you’re not ready to give up, thru is going to be the way out. Numbers are data points and don’t dictate the story or control the narrative until you let them. I have never and will never let numbers control me nor my agenda. If you’re not ready to throw in the towel and give up on hope, I’ll see you at 10:30AM Monday morning.
His Response:
For the last several months I’ve been fighting an uphill battle and I can’t win it. I’ve attempted Hail Mary passes, and I’ve been forced to beg and borrow. It’s breaking my heart to say it, but I can no longer see what is worth saving or a path to save it. I’ve been going through this week like a zombie, unable to work or concentrate, weeping in parking lots, stressed out of my mind. It’s been the most difficult decision of my life...I don’t know what you see that is worth trying to save anymore, and I can’t imagine a path toward saving it that isn’t filled with additional humiliations and failures. And I don’t know how many more of those my soul can bear...
Been there Man. Been at the place where I didn't think I could take any more, where I wanted to give up and throw in the towel on life. I been in that place where even minor decisions like what to wear or which driving direction to take not only caused major consternation but also physically hurt and caused pain thru out my whole body. How about you, my readers? Have you ever been here?
Some say "...Life is a bitch and then you die..." The jury is still deliberating on how all this shit is gonna pan out. But, here's what keeps me going in spite of the hardship of struggles, in spite of haves and don't haves, in spite of who is with me or who the hell is against me, in spite of not always feeling like I can make it or always believing I will make it. The fact that I'm still standing in spite of the shit that has gone against me and comes my way, this keeps me going. The freedom I have experienced in speaking and sharing my lived truth no matter who doesn't like it and no matter how awful others my think that truth is keeps me going when it seems like the whole damn world is standing against me.
This is my bottom line, "...Life is not about avoiding the storms. It’s about learning to dance in the rain...” Thanks for sharing my friend. Keep your head up. You have nothing to be ashamed of; stay in the game. You're a good man and this world needs the gifts of your soul and spirit. Your fighting energy in spite of your trials will live on!!
